The actress has a son Oliver and twins John and Gustave with her ex-husband Scott Phillips

Julie Bowen’s sons grow up – and become estranged from their mother.

The Modern Family alum, 54, appeared on Thursday, September 12 in an episode of Today with Hoda & Jenna and spoke about her teenage sons – Oliver, 17, and twins John and Gustave, 15 – whom she co-parents with ex-husband Scott Phillips.

She noticed that she spent a lot of time apart from them while working on her new show hysteriaBowen says she has found a creative way to stay in touch with her sons.

“Luckily, they’ve all grown, at different rates and at different times. Right now, I only communicate with them via Snapchat because I work on the East Coast and they live in LA,” says the actress.

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Related: Julie Bowen shares rare photo of three sons as one visits emergency room with broken wrist on family vacation

“Do they talk to you about things?” Jenna Bush Hager asks later in the conversation.

“You mean like girls? No. I have a lot of books deliberately scattered around the house with information about sex, drugs, what to avoid, how not to impregnate people, how not to get diseases. I talk about things all the time…” Bowen jokes, trailing off.

Then, co-host Hoda Kotb asks Bowen how she builds a relationship with her teenage sons.

“I say no cell phones in the car. They can listen to whatever music they want, but that alone says, ‘My eyes are bleeding,'” Bowen says. “But yes, I don’t let them look at their phones.”

“But basically, I’m in the desert right now. It’s like three boys I was totally in love with dumped me,” she continues. “I say, ‘Hey, I’m in the kitchen in a minute,’ and they never show up. I feel more desperate than I ever did in high school when I had a crush on a boy.”

“‘Hello… it’s me… Mommy… I gave birth to you?'” Bowen imitates. “They don’t care. But they are excited. They are excited about hysteriaYou are looking forward to Happy Gilmore. They are happy about new things.”

Although Bowen doesn’t often share photos of her sons, she posted a rare snapshot of all three on Instagram last July, along with an X-ray showing a broken wrist.

“It’s not a holiday without a trip to the ER for a broken wrist… Both bones are broken but John is on the mend and his brothers have been absolute champions,” she captioned the two photos.

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