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A bridesmaid was defended online for refusing to perform at her ex-girlfriend’s wedding reception after she was kicked out of the wedding party.

In Reddit’s confession forum “Am I The A**hole”, the woman vented her displeasure and asked her internet readers whether they thought it was justified that she did not want to deliver the promised service.

The Reddit user was originally supposed to be a bridesmaid and provide entertainment at her best friend’s wedding. Being asked to be part of the wedding party was no surprise, as she had known her friend for 10 years. However, the Reddit user was unsure of what to bring the bride and groom as a wedding gift.

“When planning the wedding, I asked them if they preferred a traditional wedding gift or if they needed help with the wedding,” she explained. “I’m a singer in a wedding band and we’ve played for free for friends and family before and we offered to play a set and get food in return.”

According to the original writer, her friend was “very excited” about the prospect of her band playing, but after the engagement party, her mood quickly changed.

The Reddit user admitted: “At the engagement party, I had a huge fight with my fiancé. To the point where my boyfriend kicked me out of the wedding party. And later the entire wedding.”

Although she didn’t expect to be left out of the wedding party when her friend told her she was getting married, the Reddit writer was relieved to be exempt from the ceremony. She thought she would be left out of the reception as well, but that wasn’t the case.

Since she was no longer welcome, the Reddit user assumed that she no longer had to give the happy couple a gift. Her former friend saw things differently.

“My former girlfriend (her words) insisted that since they ‘booked’ us, we were obligated to perform at their wedding,” the original poster explained. “For free. I told her we were only performing for friends and family for free and that they would even pay for accommodation, travel and feed us at the event.”

Since she and the bride are no longer friends, the Reddit user explained that she would have to pay her band their “standard fee” if she wanted the band to perform.

The Redditor admitted: “Since then, she has been badmouthing us to all of our mutual friends. They think that to keep the peace, we should just do what we promised.”

The Reddit user wondered if her perception of the situation was wrong and asked her anonymous readers for their impressions. The majority agreed.

“You are absolutely within your rights not to want to perform at the wedding for free, especially after being excluded from the wedding party and the entire event,” argued one reader. “Your offer to perform was based on the assumption that you were friends, but now that the relationship has clearly changed, there is no reason to offer your professional services for free.”

Another agreed: “If she no longer considers you a friend, she cannot expect free services. Your mutual friends should understand that professional boundaries exist for a reason. They have the right to charge your standard fee.”

One person said, “I mean, you shouldn’t be at the event at all.”

“Don’t do it! You’re helping friends and family – she’s neither. There’s no contract so tough luck for her,” noted another Redditor.