Bride is furious after her father created a PDF of her wedding invitation and sent it to ‘every single relative’ without permission
A bride-to-be said on Reddit that her father sent a PDF version of her wedding invitation to distant cousins and people she had never met without telling her,
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File images of bride and bride’s father
A bride-to-be says she is “furious” at her father and is on the verge of not speaking to him anymore because he invited extra guests to her wedding without her permission.
In a recent Reddit post, the woman explained that she lives in a different country than her father and he asked her to personally deliver some of her wedding invitations to relatives. She agreed to give him the names on the guest list, knowing that he often spent time with them in person.
When her father asked for the PDF version of the invitation to send to a relative he was talking to on WhatsApp, the bride became suspicious and asked why he didn’t just send it by mail, but she said she “naively” complied.
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“When I returned to my home country, within the first few hours I learned that he had ignored my list and sent the PDF version of the invitation to EVERY SINGLE RELATIVE, including people I had never met,” the bride wrote.
The bride said she was paying for her wedding herself and her father (who is divorced from her mother) was not allowed to be involved in financing the event.
He explained that he was torn between inviting some relatives and excluding others because that was “not the right way to do things.”
He claimed she wanted to invite the extra people because he asked her if she wanted her cousins there and she told him they were invited and would be counted. “It’s your fault, you told me to do this,” he said, according to the bride’s post.
But she meant her first cousins, she said, not her third and fourth cousins, whom she had never met and whom he had invited without asking.
The bride apologized to her father and warned him that she expected him to pay the additional people he had added to her guest list if they agreed to attend.
She claimed it was difficult to get an apology from him, but her father finally said something like, “Maybe I did something wrong, I’m sorry.”
The additional invitations were a sore spot, but the situation escalated when she found out that other cousins her father had invited were coming to the wedding.
“I informed him about these additional people and his response was, ‘Then uninvite them,'” the bride wrote.
“He created this problem. I don’t know these people, don’t have their numbers, they’re not on social media and I don’t even live in this country anymore,” the bride’s post concluded. “And yet he’s making it my problem. The urge to cut off contact and never see him again is strong and I’m angry.”
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Many people agreed with the bride in the comments on the post.
“This would make me so mad. I would tell him to uninvite all the extras or he would not be invited anymore. I have very little patience for boundary violators,” one person wrote.
The bride replied that she told her father he could either pay for the extra people or disinvite them, or she told him, “They can take your place.”
Many people gave the bride a script for the conversation she should have with her father. One user’s suggestion was simple. “Don’t worry dad, they’re still invited, but you’re not.”
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A bride and her father
Another Reddit user suggested that she speak directly to the additional guests and tell them, “Your father decided to disrespect your guest list because it was small and you don’t have room for them.”
“This is giving me heart palpitations,” one person wrote under a response, meaning that some of the bride’s invited cousins might show up without responding.
Although most comments supported the bride, one user suggested her father’s actions may have been born out of pride.
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“Everything you said is valid and understandable, and I understand why you are frustrated. Do you think this is your father’s strange way of showing his family how successful you are and therefore feeling an indirect pride that he may not be able to express to you?”
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