Stay up to date with our weekly guide to the latest trends, fashion, relationships and more

Stay up to date with our weekly guide to the latest trends, fashion, relationships and more

A bride-to-be has been defended after she almost disinvited her future mother-in-law from her wedding because of her choice of outfit.

In a recent post shared on the popular Reddit forum “Am I The A**hole,” the soon-to-be newlywed described how she offered to take her future mother-in-law shopping with her for the wedding. She noted that her fiancé’s mother only has sons and she “thought it would be a fun thing to experience together.” However, the woman declined the idea and decided to go shopping with a friend instead.

The Reddit poster explained that she and her future mother-in-law discussed what type of outfits would be appropriate for wedding guests before the shopping trip and stayed in touch during the shopping trip. “We talked multiple times about what outfit she would end up wearing and specifically talked about how I would not be OK with guests wearing white or ivory as that is something that should be reserved for the bride in my eyes,” the bride-to-be explained. “She went shopping yesterday to buy her outfit and sent me photos of so many beautiful outfits she tried on while still in the store.”

She noticed that none of the outfits in the photos were white or ivory, and later asked the groom’s mother if she had been “successful” in choosing an outfit. However, her future mother-in-law had ultimately chosen a white dress for the wedding and sent the bride a photo of the outfit.

The Reddit poster explained that the white dress could not be returned because the store did not accept refunds, and then described how angry she and the groom were about the situation.

“I was ANGRY. I spoke to my fiancé and he agreed that she was probably being intentional about the dress being white. We both agreed that the dress was pretty but the color was too much,” she wrote. “I haven’t responded to my mother-in-law yet because I don’t really know what to say.”

Although she did not want to be a “bridezilla,” the woman explained how she had made it clear to her mother-in-law that she could not buy a white dress for the wedding.

She ended her post by describing her fiancé’s conversation with his mother before asking if she was wrong for telling her mother-in-law that she couldn’t wear white to the wedding. “My fiancé spoke to my mother-in-law, he didn’t mention my feelings about the dress but she told him she didn’t think I liked it. When he asked her why she thought that, she stopped responding,” the bride-to-be wrote.

The Reddit post quickly went viral, garnering more than 7,900 upvotes. In the comments, several people defended the bride and encouraged her fiancé to tell his mother that she couldn’t wear the outfit. Other people gave her advice on how to explain to the groom’s mother that the dress wasn’t appropriate for the wedding.

“All her fiancé has to do is ask to see the dress and HE tells her it’s inappropriate to wear white. His mother, his problem. He can be a big boy and take care of it for you,” one user responded.

“Seriously, it doesn’t get any simpler than that. Her fiancé tells his mother, ‘No white, period,'” another agreed. “I assume she already knows this but wants attention.”

“Tell her that any guest wearing white is a HUGE breach of social etiquette, but for the groom’s mother to wear white is an even worse faux pas, making you feel like all the guests are talking about her bad manners and social backwardness. Tell her that you clearly stated that the dress should NOT be white or cream – and ask her point blank why she intentionally chose a dress that would be so embarrassing for her son’s wedding,” a third person wrote.

Others said they had experienced similar situations at their own weddings when their mother-in-law decided to wear white.

“My mother-in-law wore a floor-length ivory pantsuit to her daughter’s wedding and I made it clear to her early on that we were not going to play that game with our wedding. In fact, she sent pictures of a white sundress and I immediately un-responded to her and told my (then) fiancé about it. He took care of it and my mother-in-law ended up buying herself a very pretty teal dress to wear,” one person said.

Normally, the rule of thumb is that guests should not wear white at a wedding. In an interview with The knotWedding dress designer Madeline Gardner explained the reasons behind this rule and pointed out some other colors that guests should avoid.

“When attending a wedding, the most important thing to be careful about is not to steal the show or upset the bride,” she said. “It’s safe to avoid outfits that are predominantly white, cream or ivory.”