DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am marrying a wonderful man after three years of dating. He has a sister and a brother. I have two sisters. All of our siblings will be at our wedding reception.

However, one person is left out: my fiancé’s brother, Max, has a long-time girlfriend named Jenna. The two have been together since high school and have been together for almost 10 years.

Jenna is very smart, funny and ambitious. We usually get along very well. I consider her part of my fiancé’s family and would love to include her in the wedding party.

However, my fiancé and my mother have reservations about this. My fiancé is not keen on the idea because Jenna has not been very supportive after our engagement. She has never congratulated us and is silent when we discuss wedding plans.

I think it’s because she and Max have been together for so long and it bothers her a little that we’re getting married before them. I don’t blame her. She didn’t handle it very nicely, but excluding her from the wedding reception isn’t going to spark any warm feelings between us.

I think if she is part of the wedding party, she will feel more included and we might get closer. My mother is not keen on the idea because she thinks it is inappropriate to include someone who has not “married into the family”.